Some time ago, I read an interesting article, or perhaps it was an excerpt from a book by Dr. James Dobson. He was talking about the importance of the relationship between a man and his wife. He explained while it is important to treat your wife like the lady she is, it is also important for the wife to know her responsibility as helpmeet.
He explained a time when he had had a very trying day, but he and his wife needed to attend an event that evening, that they could not miss. It was especially important to his wife. It was a formal event, and she had long looked forward to it.
He knew he had to go; and along with that he wanted it to be evident to all attending, that his wife was treated in the manner that she should be. He wanted to give her the respect she desired in front of these people that were so important to her. He opened the doors for her, held her coat, and pulled out her chair. He did everything a gentleman should do for a lady.
On returning home, he explained in his article, how when he pulled into the driveway, and was about to get out of the car to open the garage door, before he was able, his wife in her formal attire, jumped out of the car and pulled open the garage door for him. He said he sat there with his mouth open, but he never forgot the moment. He explained how, he had been there for her throughout the evening, being everything she needed him to be, but when he was almost unbearably tired and worn out, and it was a moment where she could help him, she was right there to do so.
I never forgot that story from Dr. Dobson, my son, and I wanted to share it with you, as I contemplate all that I want to tell you about my hopes for your future wife. It has long been my prayer, since you were a little boy, that you would find the right woman to share your life.
I’ve seen many stories about hopes that parents have for their daughters; and the warnings they might give to future, hopeful suitors. I think it is a bit more unusual to find something written about our desires for our sons; so I decided to write my own. Let me convey my prayers for you and the woman who will share your life…
Of course first and foremost, I pray she is the one that God has selected for you; and that you have prayerfully considered before believing you have the right woman.
I hope she is all that you need her to be. I hope she is beautiful and healthy and fit; but even more than that, I hope she is beautiful, healthy and fit on the inside. Our hope as parents is that her heart is prepared by the One that should be at the center of your union. ~ Proverbs 31:30
I pray that "trust" will be understood as one of the most important aspects of your marriage. ~Proverbs 31:10-31 May she trust your judgment, decisions, and loyalty to her and your family. May you trust that she will be loyal to you in every aspect including a personal loyalty that will not be questioned by those who are watching your marriage. ~Proverbs 31: 10-11; 1 Peter 3:16
I pray that she will be sensitive to your needs and that you will always meet her needs as well.
I hope she is strong, yet sensitive – just as you are. I pray she instinctively knows like Dr. Dobson's wife knew, when it is time to reverse the roles and be there to offer support to you.
I pray she is wise and able to give valuable input and insight that you both will be able to prayerfully consider. ~ Proverbs 31:26 But when all is said and done, I pray she understands that after discussion, the final decision rests with you as you are the one accountable to God in every decision as head of the home. ~Ephesians 5:22-24; 1 Corinthians 11:3
Every woman must understand it is the man that God has placed as the spiritual head of the home. Every man and woman should know God must be at the center and His Word is the ultimate authority. ~1 Corinthians 11:3
May you both know and understand the meaning of your vows, and that you both are to leave your homes and cleave to one another. Each should be the most important person in one another's lives. ~ Genesis 2: 24; Matthew 19:5; Ephesians 5:31
There must be obedience and respect from both parties; I pray you will never see those long spoken vows “love, honor and obey” as old-fashioned or foolish. ~ 1 Corinthians 11:11
May she fully know and believe that you will be one, who as instructed by God, will "love your wife as Christ loved the church". I know you are capable of that kind of love, son. ~Ephesians 5: 25
I hope she raises your children along side you in the love and admonition of the Lord. May they be raised to know there is nothing more important than God at the center of your lives! ~Joshua 24:15; ~Psalm 128:3
I pray she will love and respect the kids you will be blessed with. And I hope she will often see everything from a child’s eyes, which will give her understanding that will better allow her to respond to their needs.
I pray she will know that you are as important to your children’s life as she is and that there is no distinction between the importance of mother and father.
I pray that her desire will be to stay home with your children and never put them into the trust of anyone who doesn’t love them or who might endanger them.
I hope she will laugh with your children, and not let them take themselves too seriously, understanding they are only kids.
I hope she will easily laugh with you and never at you.
I hope she will never mock you publicly, or correct you in front of your family or piers, but rather she will know the exact timing when to bring an issue to the forefront of a discussion...with only the two of you.
I pray she will never join those who antagonize you, attack you or make fun of you. We both know there have been and always will be people that do that. May she never take part, but instead be brave enough to stand against that kind of dialogue – even though she is a lady. A lady knows how to defend her own, with class. May she always be confident that you will do the same; and even more than that, that everyone will know that fact simply by your presence and demeanor! May there never be an attempt to unfairly discredit your lives. ~1 Peter 3:1a; ~1 Timothy 3:11
I hope she will never be derogatory behind your back. ~1 Timothy 3:11; ~1 Peter 3:1a
I hope she does not look at you as her “cash cow” – as the one that is supposed to give her everything she thinks she desires – but rather she will be one who understands her role in helping you provide for your family.
I pray she knows how to help with the burden of finances. ~Proverbs 31:13-16 I pray she knows how to conserve and I hope she understands when it time to splurge.
May she always understand your gift of giving while never abusing that invaluable gift!
I pray you will always be one, who like Dr. Dobson, treats his wife with the love and respect she deserves; not only for her, but also for your children who will be ever watching and learning from your example. ~Psalm 128:3
May your wife always recognize this fact and treat you in the same respectful manner in order to demonstrate a loving union to your kids.
One of the dearest memories and pieces of advice on marriage that I have ever received is from my maternal grandma, who in my opinion was just about tops in the way of wife and mother. I will never forget what she told me one time when she was talking about my grandpa. “Sometimes he had to come home late after working a long day. I was frustrated at him missing dinner. But I always had dinner on the stove and I always left a light on for him. I wanted him to know he was appreciated and that I was always there for him.”
I pray that you will have the same welcoming that my grandpa had - that your home will be your resting place, your peaceful palace. I hope it is a place to relax, and laugh; and live and love. A place where you will make plans, fulfill hopes and wishes, and raise a family.
I pray your wife, your helpmeet, will be your best friend. And I hope she will always leave a light on for you. ~ Genesis 2:18
I pray you will always be the provider and the head of your household that God designed you to be. ~ 1 Timothy 5:8 I pray you will always take care of your wife, love her and protect her. But along with that, I also pray that your wife will inherently know when it is time for her to bring comfort, support and help to you…just as noted in the opening anecdote.
Finally, I only hope she loves you completely and unconditionally and will demonstrate that love not only to you, but also to your kids and all who look upon your marriage. ~1 Peter 3;16
You see, son, though as a society we worry more about our daughters, and our women; and though there have been many father letters written to daughters, or father letters written to future son-in-laws, the converse is also true. We want our sons to be taken care of, too. It is something a mama just can't help but desire and worry about just a little, and so I write.
But truly, the best way for you to be taken care of is if you follow the God-given instructions specified so clearly in His Word, written just for you.
I know you are that kind of man. I pray for that kind of woman.
He explained a time when he had had a very trying day, but he and his wife needed to attend an event that evening, that they could not miss. It was especially important to his wife. It was a formal event, and she had long looked forward to it.
He knew he had to go; and along with that he wanted it to be evident to all attending, that his wife was treated in the manner that she should be. He wanted to give her the respect she desired in front of these people that were so important to her. He opened the doors for her, held her coat, and pulled out her chair. He did everything a gentleman should do for a lady.
On returning home, he explained in his article, how when he pulled into the driveway, and was about to get out of the car to open the garage door, before he was able, his wife in her formal attire, jumped out of the car and pulled open the garage door for him. He said he sat there with his mouth open, but he never forgot the moment. He explained how, he had been there for her throughout the evening, being everything she needed him to be, but when he was almost unbearably tired and worn out, and it was a moment where she could help him, she was right there to do so.
I never forgot that story from Dr. Dobson, my son, and I wanted to share it with you, as I contemplate all that I want to tell you about my hopes for your future wife. It has long been my prayer, since you were a little boy, that you would find the right woman to share your life.
I’ve seen many stories about hopes that parents have for their daughters; and the warnings they might give to future, hopeful suitors. I think it is a bit more unusual to find something written about our desires for our sons; so I decided to write my own. Let me convey my prayers for you and the woman who will share your life…
Of course first and foremost, I pray she is the one that God has selected for you; and that you have prayerfully considered before believing you have the right woman.
I hope she is all that you need her to be. I hope she is beautiful and healthy and fit; but even more than that, I hope she is beautiful, healthy and fit on the inside. Our hope as parents is that her heart is prepared by the One that should be at the center of your union. ~ Proverbs 31:30
I pray that "trust" will be understood as one of the most important aspects of your marriage. ~Proverbs 31:10-31 May she trust your judgment, decisions, and loyalty to her and your family. May you trust that she will be loyal to you in every aspect including a personal loyalty that will not be questioned by those who are watching your marriage. ~Proverbs 31: 10-11; 1 Peter 3:16
I pray that she will be sensitive to your needs and that you will always meet her needs as well.
I hope she is strong, yet sensitive – just as you are. I pray she instinctively knows like Dr. Dobson's wife knew, when it is time to reverse the roles and be there to offer support to you.
I pray she is wise and able to give valuable input and insight that you both will be able to prayerfully consider. ~ Proverbs 31:26 But when all is said and done, I pray she understands that after discussion, the final decision rests with you as you are the one accountable to God in every decision as head of the home. ~Ephesians 5:22-24; 1 Corinthians 11:3
Every woman must understand it is the man that God has placed as the spiritual head of the home. Every man and woman should know God must be at the center and His Word is the ultimate authority. ~1 Corinthians 11:3
May you both know and understand the meaning of your vows, and that you both are to leave your homes and cleave to one another. Each should be the most important person in one another's lives. ~ Genesis 2: 24; Matthew 19:5; Ephesians 5:31
There must be obedience and respect from both parties; I pray you will never see those long spoken vows “love, honor and obey” as old-fashioned or foolish. ~ 1 Corinthians 11:11
May she fully know and believe that you will be one, who as instructed by God, will "love your wife as Christ loved the church". I know you are capable of that kind of love, son. ~Ephesians 5: 25
I hope she raises your children along side you in the love and admonition of the Lord. May they be raised to know there is nothing more important than God at the center of your lives! ~Joshua 24:15; ~Psalm 128:3
I pray she will love and respect the kids you will be blessed with. And I hope she will often see everything from a child’s eyes, which will give her understanding that will better allow her to respond to their needs.
I pray she will know that you are as important to your children’s life as she is and that there is no distinction between the importance of mother and father.
I pray that her desire will be to stay home with your children and never put them into the trust of anyone who doesn’t love them or who might endanger them.
I hope she will laugh with your children, and not let them take themselves too seriously, understanding they are only kids.
I hope she will easily laugh with you and never at you.
I hope she will never mock you publicly, or correct you in front of your family or piers, but rather she will know the exact timing when to bring an issue to the forefront of a discussion...with only the two of you.
I pray she will never join those who antagonize you, attack you or make fun of you. We both know there have been and always will be people that do that. May she never take part, but instead be brave enough to stand against that kind of dialogue – even though she is a lady. A lady knows how to defend her own, with class. May she always be confident that you will do the same; and even more than that, that everyone will know that fact simply by your presence and demeanor! May there never be an attempt to unfairly discredit your lives. ~1 Peter 3:1a; ~1 Timothy 3:11
I hope she will never be derogatory behind your back. ~1 Timothy 3:11; ~1 Peter 3:1a
I hope she does not look at you as her “cash cow” – as the one that is supposed to give her everything she thinks she desires – but rather she will be one who understands her role in helping you provide for your family.
I pray she knows how to help with the burden of finances. ~Proverbs 31:13-16 I pray she knows how to conserve and I hope she understands when it time to splurge.
May she always understand your gift of giving while never abusing that invaluable gift!
I pray you will always be one, who like Dr. Dobson, treats his wife with the love and respect she deserves; not only for her, but also for your children who will be ever watching and learning from your example. ~Psalm 128:3
May your wife always recognize this fact and treat you in the same respectful manner in order to demonstrate a loving union to your kids.
One of the dearest memories and pieces of advice on marriage that I have ever received is from my maternal grandma, who in my opinion was just about tops in the way of wife and mother. I will never forget what she told me one time when she was talking about my grandpa. “Sometimes he had to come home late after working a long day. I was frustrated at him missing dinner. But I always had dinner on the stove and I always left a light on for him. I wanted him to know he was appreciated and that I was always there for him.”
I pray that you will have the same welcoming that my grandpa had - that your home will be your resting place, your peaceful palace. I hope it is a place to relax, and laugh; and live and love. A place where you will make plans, fulfill hopes and wishes, and raise a family.
I pray your wife, your helpmeet, will be your best friend. And I hope she will always leave a light on for you. ~ Genesis 2:18
I pray you will always be the provider and the head of your household that God designed you to be. ~ 1 Timothy 5:8 I pray you will always take care of your wife, love her and protect her. But along with that, I also pray that your wife will inherently know when it is time for her to bring comfort, support and help to you…just as noted in the opening anecdote.
Finally, I only hope she loves you completely and unconditionally and will demonstrate that love not only to you, but also to your kids and all who look upon your marriage. ~1 Peter 3;16
You see, son, though as a society we worry more about our daughters, and our women; and though there have been many father letters written to daughters, or father letters written to future son-in-laws, the converse is also true. We want our sons to be taken care of, too. It is something a mama just can't help but desire and worry about just a little, and so I write.
But truly, the best way for you to be taken care of is if you follow the God-given instructions specified so clearly in His Word, written just for you.
I know you are that kind of man. I pray for that kind of woman.
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